What Are My Small Victories And Successes?
I was going to say that I don't know; I don't really count or celebrate victories. If I think about it, it's probably because I have the same view about success as I do about joy and gratitude. If it’s not massive/something big it doesn't count.
That's bullshit though, success doesn't have to be huge, it doesn't have to be earning $1 Million a year (not that I’m earning nearly that much), or having a garage full of cars you can’t drive because you can only drive one car at a time anyway.
Success can be getting out of bed when you're depressed; it can be meeting someone for coffee when you’d rather stay inside, or going out and meeting new people when you feel crippled by anxiety. Success can also be things no one else sees
if I think about it like that, I realise I have come a long way, and have had many victories in my life:
- I have not been a victim of circumstance. This is probably my biggest victory; I grew up poor, and in a single parent household. That was never the life I envisioned for myself. Even though I left High School and didn't go to University, I still went on to have some amazing jobs, I married someone who is incredibly loving and supportive, and bought an apartment.
- I bought an apartment! That's pretty fucking huge.
- I painted the apartment. This was a big thing for me. I tend to suck at things like this; patience and paying attention to detail when it comes to DIY are not strengths of mine.
- I have attended events where I didn't know anyone and had was crippled by anxiety. The anxiety was so bad I would often have a panic attack beforehand where I would cry, and try to talk myself out of going. I ended up having an amazing time I went - every time.
- I have overcome depression; I still know it could come back, but I have strength in knowing I have been through it before, and I can get through it again.
That's all I can think of at the moment, I guess it's because I feel these victories and successes tie into each other. At their core, they are things that show who I am; I am someone strong, someone defiant and someone who holds a light that will never be diminished.